Flying Solo

Fridays with Ken

Job had friends who played a key role in his story just like we do in other people’s stories. How can we guard ourselves from “Know-It-All” mentalities when ministering to others?

If we start by recognizing how badly we need grace and that all wisdom comes from God then we are less likely to rely on the self-serving attitude of “Know-It-All”.

What is the best thing we can do for our friends when they are suffering?

Listen.  Listen to them, listen to the impact it makes on your heart and listen for God.  Don’t try to fix it.  Only God can do that and most often He doesn’t because He wants our growth to come through dependency on Him.

 

Ken Edwards is a graduate of the University of Arkansas and has earned a Master of Divinity, Master of Arts in Marriage and Family Counseling and a Master of Arts in Religious Education of Southwestern Seminary. But his discernment matches his education and for me often the greater gift. He lives with his wife Janet and three children in Franklin, Tennessee. And this is him enjoying what he loves, the mountains in Wyoming. Except he's usually behind the camera. And he has been kind enough to spend Friday’s with us. What he is offering us regarding his time is a gift. I hope we will take advantage of it.

 

Got Question's for Ken? Email your questions to [email protected]

Thursday Thumbprint

A few years back I wrote this on my old blog…

Since Thanksgiving is less than two weeks away, I wondered if we could spend them thinking about things we are thankful for. The idea came to me the other morning lying in bed with the cloud over my head about as gray as the cloud that loomed outside. I knew why it was there. It was that lovely week of PMS when all women take one moment to tell Eve how much they wish they could slap her. I'd ask for forgiveness when I was through, but I have to say there is a brief moment each month that it takes all I have to not despise the woman.

But as I was lying there I gave myself a task. Keep your eyes open for things to be grateful for. No complaining for the next two weeks. Only talking about what your thankful for. Now, granted this has been a year and a half of noticing all the beautiful places God has moved in my life in even a more real way than in years past, but this truly cognizant approach to my day had me quite amazed at all I saw. Here's my list for this past week. I challenge you to do the same this week and share with us what you noticed...

I'm thankful that I still PMS, because the alternative isn't that appealing at my age.
I'm thankful that the new lines around my eyes this year came from laughing.
I'm thankful for three hour car rides with friends who aren't afraid to be honest, vulnerable and don't mind that I have to go to the bathroom every hundred miles.
I'm thankful that babies smell so good and don't care if you make a fool out of yourself.
I'm thankful that my dogs are just as excited to see me after five minutes as they are after five days.
I'm thankful for strangers who risk becoming your friend.
I'm thankful for people who take their creativity and write songs that I can sing to the top of my lungs in my car.
I'm thankful for the homemade biscuits and peach preserves at Loveless Cafe.

 

Wednesday 1 on with Karen con't.........

Our interview this month is my friend Karen Finley. Karen and I met a couple years back at one of our Fun and Frolic weekends with my precious friend and mentor Ann Platz. Karen has a beautiful story. She grew up the child of an evangelist and school teacher. She had wonderful success in the corporate world, and spent the last seventeen years working in conflict resolution for Bell south. She also has spent the last thirty years as a member of Mt. Paran Church in Atlanta, where she works with the Women’s Mentoring Program.

Karen, we are talking this month about what we are most grateful for. What were some of the things you were most grateful for during this experience?

Definitely my friends. My precious friend and yours Ann Platz. came and got me from Peggy’s. She said she saw my father’s face and he said do not let me stay in a hotel. Ann Platz let me stay in her beautiful home. When her husband died almost a year ago, I moved in and stayed with her in the times when no one else was there. I would sit and read her books just to be in her house in case she needed me.

 

25 years ago, Ann decorated this same condo. She was the instrument that said to me to buy it. She has been such a close friend since that time and seen me through the worst of times.  She was
my landlord, counselor, prayer partner, and decorator.  When I moved back into my condo she decorated it once more. It is more beautiful than I could imagine. And all that God showed and did for me has filled me with an indescribable attitude of gratitude.

 

 

Tuesday Tips

Healthy Holiday Eating Tips for Thanksgiving

Written by Gloria Tsang, RD of HealthCastle.com

Published in Nov 2005; Updated in Nov 2007 healthy thanksgiving tips dinner(HealthCastle.com) Do you know that the average Thanksgiving dinner has over 2000 calories? It can be a real challenge if you are watching your waistline. The following are some eating tips so that you can still look good and be healthy after the Thanksgiving dinner without having to deprive yourself.

Healthy Holiday Eating Tips for Thanksgiving

If you are a guest of a Thanksgiving dinner:

    * Don't go to the Thanksgiving dinner hungry: we often eat faster and more when we are hungry - therefore eat a wholesome breakfast and lunch on the day to avoid overeating at dinner time.
    * Thanksgiving dinner is not an all-you-can-eat buffet: Fill your plate half with vegetables, one quarter with a lean meat and the rest with a starch of your choice. Eat slowly and stop when you are full.
    * Turkey - go skinless: choose your 4-oz turkey portion skinless to slash away some fat and cholesterol. Save your appetite for the side dishes and desserts.
    * Side Dishes - watch your portion size: go for smaller portions. This way you can sample all the different foods. Moderation is always the key.
    * Make a conscious choice to limit high fat items: high fat food items can be found in fried and creamy dishes as well as cheese-filled casseroles in a traditional Thanksgiving meal . For instance, mashed potatoes are usually made with butter and milk; green bean casseroles are often prepared with cream of mushroom soup, cheese and milk and topped with fried onions; candied yams are loaded with cream, sugar and marshmallows. If you cannot control the ingredients that go in to a dish, simply limit yourself to a smaller helping size. Again moderation is the key.
    * Drink plenty of water: alcohol and coffee can dehydrate your body. Drink calorie-free water to help fill up your stomach and keep you hydrated.

If you are the honorable chef of a Thanksgiving dinner:

    * Substitute high fat ingredients with lower-fat or fat-free ingredients. Learn about the 5 easy steps to recipe substitutions or see table below.
    * Leftover Turkey? Instead of turkey sandwiches, use the leftover turkey to make a pot of soup with fresh chunky vegetables.
    * Experiment with new recipes: we did a search on Google and found numerous delicious yet healthy low-fat contemporary Thanksgiving recipes. Experiment!

http://www.healthcastle.com/holiday-eating-healthy-thanksgiving.shtml

 

Got some of your favorite Tips you want to share? Email them to [email protected]

Monday Musings

And at the end of Job’s story Job must offer up a prayer. In the middle of Job’s mess, in the middle of this most sacred season of his life that God had allowed him to walk through in order for him to see God as he’s never seen him before, Job’s friends abuse him.

They abuse him to such a degree that God tells them how angry he is with them. Because they have not spoken rightly like Job. He tells them they are to make a sacrifice and that Job will pray for them and he will accept his prayer and not deal with them as their stupidity truly deserves.

This makes me wonder what role do I play in other people’s stories? Everyone has a story. Everyone has painful moments. Everyone has seasons where life can be exceptionally brutal. So, what part do I play in their story?

My best friend tells me I am her husband’s greatest advocate. For that he trusts her to tell me anything they walk through. But what if I wasn’t? What if every time she was angry I told her what a horrible man he was (which he isn’t, he’s a treasure, so it’s easy to say that.) But what if I didn’t. What if my perspective was so short sited that I missed the opportunity in which God offers me.

As much as people are a part of our story, we are a part of theirs? Are people grateful we’re in their story? Or would they rather God go pull their understudy? Do we offer words of life? Or we only people-pleasers wanting to tell them whatever we can for them to like us, remain our friends? Or are we the opposite, so convinced we are always right, that whatever we say must be accepted or that individual is simply wrong? Or are we friends we even while they are talking are praying asking God for wisdom on how to respond?

I have found that very often I can go to meet with someone and know exactly what I’m going to say because after all I know everything right? And as I sit there, praying, asking God, “Lord, what are You really saying here.” That very often the “agenda” I came with is replaced by what God wants to say through me….

What kind of friend are you? It matters…it really matters…

 

Sunday Reflections

This is your time. Reflect with us about your week, your friends, or what God has become to you. This is your space. Your time.